Thoughts & Sayings (March 2013)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in February. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. Everything I need is right here. Why would I ever travel?

travel

2. Time slows down whenever I exercise, so I replaced my chair with a treadmill.

treadmill

Twisted Words

3. If you think sophomoric humor is annoying, try freshmanic.

sophomoric

4. To air is human, to give forth, sublime.

air

In Its Own Write

5. My book is so spooky, it’s paraabnormal.

paraabnormal

6. Where are all the pre-apocalyptic stories?

preapocalyptic

Holidays & Events

7. The award for best actor should go to the guy who’s home sick watching the Oscars.

oscars

8. The Academy Award “Oscar” statuette could very well have been called the “Harmon,” “Nelson,” or “Pierce.” Why? (*answer below)

9. Oh, sorry, I thought you said today was Vampire’s Day.

vampires

10. The glow from the computer screen makes you look absolutely radiant. Happy Valentine’s Day!

valentine

11. I tried to think of something that rhymes with “Pope,” but nope.

12. It’s the 21st Century. Time to rename the Grammys the MP3ys.

grammys

13. Happy Chinese New Year After the Dragon Year!

cnewyear

14. In this year’s Super Bowl, “MVP” stands for “Most Valuable Power.”

superbowl2

15. The Milk breaks two Blueberry tackles for a touchdown in the Super Bowl.

superbowl

Random Musings

16. Times change. Someday Justin Bieber will be in the Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame.

rocknroll

17. Retweet this if you want more followers! Well, at least one.

Click here to visit the Thoughts & Sayings page, or click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts & Sayings.

* The actual origin of the Academy Award statuette name “Oscar” is unclear, but legend has it that it was named after actress Bette Davis’ husband Harmon Oscar Nelson or Oscar Pierce, uncle of the Academy’s one-time executive secretary, Margaret Herrick.

Images courtesy of Microsoft. Chinese New Year photo is property of M.G. Edwards.

buythumb[3]M.G. Edwards is a writer of books and stories in the mystery, thriller and science fiction-fantasy genres. He also writes travel adventures. He is author of Kilimanjaro: One Man’s Quest to Go Over the Hill, a non-fiction account of his attempt to summit Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain, a collection of short stories called Real Dreams: Thirty Years of Short Stories and Alexander the Salamander, a children’s story set in the Amazon. His books are available to purchase as an e-book and in print from Amazon.com and other booksellers. He lives in Bangkok, Thailand with his wife Jing and son Alex.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

© 2013 Brilliance Press. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted without the written consent of the author.

Thoughts & Sayings (February 2013)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in January. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. Once you go off the beaten track, you never go back.

track

2. I’m like a shoe looking for its soul.

shoe

3. I feel de spare whenever I see my belly in the mirror.

belly

Twisted Words

4. I can’t seem to keep that fly off the handle!

handle

5. I didn’t want to shovel snow, so I glared at it until it melted.

glare

6. Chickens recoop their losses when farmers take their eggs.

chickens

In Its Own Write

7. I’m going back to my cave to write and bang out something.

cave

Holidays & Events

8. American adoptive parents left out in the cold by Russia, take heart! Thousands of wealthy Frenchmen are eagerly waiting to be adopted.

adoption

9. This year’s hot French travel destination is Russia.

russia

10. I have a hunch 2013 will be unlucky, so I skipped a year.

2013

11. How come 2013 doesn’t look much different than last year? I thought everything would change.

Random Musings

12. 🙂 is the Chinese character for LOL.

smiley

13. Would yesterday’s masters succeed as contemporary artists?

artists

14. If you’re selling Twitter followers, wouldn’t it be easier to make money selling 1 for a dollar?

15. This is the most important message you’re going to read. Until the next one.

 

Click here to visit the Thoughts & Sayings page, or click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts & Sayings.

clip_image001M.G. Edwards is a writer of books and stories in the mystery, thriller and science fiction-fantasy genres. He also writes travel adventures. He is author of Kilimanjaro: One Man’s Quest to Go Over the Hill, a non-fiction account of his attempt to summit Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain and a collection of short stories called Real Dreams: Thirty Years of Short Stories. His books are available as an e-book and in print on Amazon.com and other booksellers. He lives in Bangkok, Thailand with his wife Jing and son Alex.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

© 2013 Brilliance Press. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted without the written consent of the author.

The “Paraguay” Diet

Now that life is starting to settle down here in Virginia, I’ve focused more on getting in shape.  Once upon a time, I thought rather foolishly that I could go on the “Korean” diet and miraculously lose weight.  What’s the “Korean”diet?  Well, I’m not quite sure–I never figured it out.  It’s essentially the contention that most Koreans are in decent shape, despite the fact that Korean food–at least what you buy in the restaurant–is rather fattening, and not a few Koreans smoke, drink, and work too much (read:  sit most of the day at a desk).  I assumed that if I acted Korean, at least in terms of consumption and activity, I too would lose weight.  Au contraire (that’s French, not Korean).  I gained weight.  Someone let me know that Korean physiology lends itself to thinness, and I am of stout Anglo-Scandinavian stock that gravitates towards rotundity and portliness. 

So the “Korean” diet didn’t work.  Now that we are headed to Paraguay, I decided to go on the “Paraguay” diet.  So, what’s that?  Well, it doesn’t have anything to do with the cuisine.  As I understand it, Paraguayan cuisine is rife with red meat (read:  beef) and starch (something called “sopa,” a potato-ish vegetable).  The “Paraguay” diet has more to do with having a significantly heightened level of physical activity.  The January edition of the Foreign Service Journal rated Asunción, Paraguay one of the worst Foreign Service posts because it is so “boring.” (That is obviously an unscientific observation by someone who either doesn’t get out enough or needs to find some new hobbies.)  Frankly, boring is fine with me.  Boredom is preferable to bullets, blackouts, blizzards, and excessive beasties found at some posts worldwide.  It lets me focus on the “Paraguay” diet; that is, fill the down time with physical activity that necessitates the slendering of my body. 

Whereas the “Korean” diet focused on what I eat, the “Paraguay” diet focuses on what I do.  I’ve never found that dieting helps me lose weight, unless I completely cut out eating sugary foods.  My body responds much better to physical activity and beating it into submission by working out until I am sore (like today, when I rode my repaired bicycle back and forth from home to work. 

I’ve already started the “Paraguay” diet by doing sit ups, cycling, and walking as much as possible.  I bought a pedometer to measure my caloric burn rate, but so far, it’s been disappointing.  It’s disheartening killing yourself to burn 300 calories.  I’m hoping that by the time I arrive in Paraguay I will be so far along on my regimen that it will be easy to continue; bad streets, cobblestones, tropical weather, and petty theft be damned!