Articles with July

Thoughts & Sayings (October 2013)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in July, August, and September. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Fermented, and they’ll drink with you all day.

apple

2. I have some words of wisdom to share with you. Excuse me while I take them out of Pandora’s box.

box

Twisted Words

3. It’s harder to herd kids than goats.

goat

4. A sacred cow cows a scared cow.

cow

In Its Own Write

5. Fiction writing is the novelist concept.

novelist

6. Poetry may set you free but to make it rhyme takes time.

poetry

Holidays & Events

7. Today is Outdependence Day for those who don’t celebrate the 4th of July.

july4

Random Musings

8. We interrupt this report about yelling fire in a crowded theater for breaking news about a fire in a crowded theater.

news

9. “Because I can,” said the man when asked why he works at a packaging plant.

can

10. “What’s so great about sliced bread?” asked the baker.

bread

11. Out of the mouths of babes comes drool.

 

babes

Click here to visit the Thoughts & Sayings page, or click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts & Sayings.

Images courtesy of Microsoft.

Thoughts & Sayings (August 2012)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in July. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

  1. I’ve worked out the perfect system for getting everything done. Unfortunately, it’s prone to break down when a wrench gets thrown into it. gears
  2. Destiny is 1/4 chance and 3/4 preparation.
  3. Is it just me, or am I still who I am?
  4. Whoever put the cat in the bag really should let it out.
  5. If you are trapped in convention, you will always be conventional.
  6. Did you miss me? I didn’t. I’ve been with me the whole time.

Twisted Words

  1. stopIf you’re bored, what wood you do?
  2. It is better to be pronounced than verbose.
  3. Speaking of witch, a which can’t spell.
  4. When people ask me my sign, I usually answer, “Stop.”
  5. I do things by the seat of my pants. Sometimes I wish my jeans would quit taking so many risks.
  6. A police chef is the officer in charge of preparing the food.

Holidays & Events

  1. Perhaps the mascot of this year’s Summer Olympics in London should be “Sunshine.”
  2. Happy July 4th + 10! Thank goodness I enjoy the freedom to wish you a belated happy American Independence Day on Bastille Day.
  3. cameraGotham, Wisconsin looks nothing like it’s portrayed in the “Batman” movies.
  4. Word has it that the sequel to Pixar’s animated film “Brave” will be called “Even Braver.”
  5. Rumor has it that in the sequel to “The Amazing Spider-Man,” Andrew Garfield and Tobey Maguire will duke it out over whose girlfriend, Gwen Stacy or Mary Jane Watson, is more awesome.

Random Musings

  1. Every place in the world looks like someplace else.
  2. Spotted at the Customer Service counter of a major retailer: “Many happy returns.”
  3. I’ve thought about being a stand-up comedian, but I prefer to sit down.
  4. Why do subtitles say “English for the Hearing Impaired” when every other language is listed by name only?
  5. One literary benefit of Twitter is that it teaches one to be succinct.
  6. I can get 50,000 Twitter followers in 2 minutes! Ask me how, but please don’t expect an answer.
  7. twitterFollow me and get 5,000 Twitter followers instantly! Never mind that I only have 3,000. You can borrow some if you’d like.
  8. Prolific tweeter seeks tweeters for long-term follow on Twitter. Must tweet good content. If interested, press the “Follow” button.

In Its Own Write

26. I probably should write something now. “Something.” There, that should do it.

writing

Images courtesy of Microsoft and Twitter.

Click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts and Sayings.

buythumbM.G. Edwards is a writer of books and stories in the mystery, thriller and science fiction-fantasy genres. He also writes travel adventures. He is author of Kilimanjaro: One Man’s Quest to Go Over the Hill, a non-fiction account of his attempt to summit Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain and a collection of short stories called Real Dreams: Thirty Years of Short Stories. His books are available as an e-book and in print on Amazon.com and other booksellers. He lives in Bangkok, Thailand with his wife Jing and son Alex.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

© 2012 Brilliance Press. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted without the written consent of the author.

Thoughts & Sayings (July 2012)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in June. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. Whenever life seems to have no purpose, I lecture it about getting motivated.

2. Happy Monday! I don’t know why I’m happy to start a work week, but I wish it would stop.

3. Being flawed is a prerequisite to being appreciated for something you’ve done well.

circuitbreaker4. The word “momentum” begins with a flash and ends with a pause.

5. If only life had a breaker panel where you could flip a switch when you’re overloaded and ready to short circuit.

6. Friends come and go. Sometimes I wish they would sit and stay for a while.

Twisted Words

7. Why does the word “Saturday” begin with “sat” when most people are out and about enjoying the weekend?

scent8. The world doesn’t owe you a scent. You have to excrete it yourself.

9. A round dog with a tough exterior but a soft demeanor is a melon collie.

10. I don’t know what on Earth is going on. Thank heavens I’m well-grounded because I’m feeling spacy.

Holidays & Events

11. May annoys June because she always finishes first and is much too flowery.

12. It’s ironic that Father’s Day falls on a Sonday.

13. The financial markets are bloated because they digested too much Greece.

14. Rumor has it that the sequel to the movie Prometheus will be called “Icarus” and will feature a group of scientists searching for the origin of mankind that discovers that humanity was actually created by a violent, warlike group of human beings. Word has it that the film will be set on Earth.

icarus

Random Musings

15. A week is an artificial construct. Thank goodness someone invented weekends.

16. At this moment, millions of people are spending quality time with their tech gadgets.

17. The drawback to multitasking is that you can only finish one task at a time.

18. It’s been so long since statesmen ran our country that no one’s bothered to make the word gender neutral.

19. I drive faster in America because I use kilometers.

20. One of the most difficult travel decisions is deciding whether to consume or throw out perishable food before leaving on a trip.

21. Do Slovaks write Czechs?

prague

Click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts and Sayings.

buythumbM.G. Edwards is a writer of books and stories in the mystery, thriller and science fiction-fantasy genres. He also writes travel adventures. He is author of Kilimanjaro: One Man’s Quest to Go Over the Hill, a non-fiction account of his attempt to summit Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain and a collection of short stories called Real Dreams: Thirty Years of Short Stories. His books are available as an e-book and in print on Amazon.com and other booksellers. He lives in Bangkok, Thailand with his wife Jing and son Alex.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

© 2012 Brilliance Press. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted without the written consent of the author.