Julius Caesar

Thoughts & Sayings (April 2013)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in March. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. I aim to confuse so you don’t have to.

2. A smile is what happens when something inside comes out.

3. Exercising your mind is better than food for thought.

4. When brilliance strikes, fight back.

Twisted Words

5. Cleaning windows is such a pane, but I want them to look smashing.

6. I’m always getting into travel on the road.

In Its Own Write

7. Wouldn’t it be nice if someone wrote fill-in-the-blank stories we could buy and turn into our own books?

8. Twice upon a time, there was a story and a knock-off.

Holidays & Events

9. I filled out my brackets for March Madness. The Vatican Conclave is my top seed with the North Korea Nukes as potential spoiler. The Venezuela Chavistas should go far with Nicolas Maduro at center while the Washington Sequesters could bow out early.

10. I’m happy to be Irish for a pot of gold. Okay then, how about a pint?

11. Ides don’t know what Ides gonna do on March 15.

12. Happy International Women’s Day! Enjoy your day off.

13. Happy Sequester Day. Where are you hiding?

Random Musings

14. Wouldn’t it be nice if advertisements featured what we wanted to buy rather than something to be sold?

15. I’m like an onion. Peel away some layers and I’ll make you cry.

Click here to visit the Thoughts & Sayings page, or click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts & Sayings.

M.G. Edwards is a writer of books and stories in the mystery, thriller and science fiction-fantasy genres. He also writes travel adventures. He is author of Kilimanjaro: One Man’s Quest to Go Over the Hill, a non-fiction account of his attempt to summit Mount Kilimanjaro, Africa’s highest mountain, and a short story collection called Real Dreams: Thirty Years of Short Stories. He also wrote and illustrated Alexander the Salamander and Ellie the Elephant, two books in the World Adventurers for Kids Series. His books are available in e-book and print from Amazon.com and other booksellers. Edwards graduated from the University of Washington with a master’s degree in China Studies and a Master of Business Administration. He lives in Bangkok, Thailand with his wife Jing and son Alex.

For more books or stories by M.G. Edwards, visit his web site at www.mgedwards.com or his blog, World Adventurers. Contact him at me@mgedwards.com, on Facebook, on Google+, or @m_g_edwards on Twitter.

Thoughts and Sayings (April 2012)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in March. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. When you overestimate your abilities, you end up feeling shortchanged.

2. I’m swimming in the sea of life when I’d rather be on the shore sipping on a drink and watching the sunset.

3. I’m writing my pièce de résistance. I’ve struggled with it for so long that it will never stop fighting with me.

4. I’m determined to get something done today. Does drinking coffee count?

5. The tongue is mightier than the pen.

6. Seize the day! If you do, be prepared for a struggle.

7. If your dream has become a nightmare, it’s time for a new one.

8. The best way to attract real friends is to be real.

Twisted Words

9. Why can’t “good afternoon” be “good beforeevening“?

10. Says the cream puff to the chocolate éclair: “Wow, this place is desserted.”

11. Warning: Ultraviolent rays have the ability to kill you.

12. Aerodramatic: The art of crying at the speed of flight.

13. I’m not sure if I’m more sardonic or sarcastic. Perhaps sardoncastic.

14. Don’t take wood for granite.

15. Overheard at a meeting of contortionists: “Be flexible!”

16. Never suggest a health condition is grave to someone who is terminally ill.

Holidays & Events

17. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Since you’re in the green, I get the gold.

18. Beware the Ides of March,” said the soothsayer to Julius Caesar. His English was impeccable.

19. Beware, beware the Ides of March! Psst…what’s an ‘Ides’?

20. Heading into Super Tuesday, the polls showed that the new iPad is leading by a wide margin.

21. Happy Cinco de Marzo! Oh, wait, sorry. I’ll be back in a couple of months.

22. I forgot that yesterday was Leap Year and marched right past it.

Random Musings

23. European chocolates are delicious but too delectable to eat like candy.

24. Why aren’t there any books with the opening sentence, “It was a bright and calm morning?”

25. A guy walks into a bar. It was metal. It hurt.

26. My bed is calling. For some reason, it’s saying, “You have reached a non-working number. Please hang up and try again.”

27. Thank you for paying attention to me. However, my medium of exchange is cash.

28. You have reached a real person. If you feel you’ve reached me in error and prefer an automated system, contact 800-SPAM-BOT.

29. When food is revolting, does it rebel against you?

Intra-galactic Sophomoric Humor

30. Uranus is the most joked about planet in the solar system.

31. Earth stands between Mars and Venus to keep them from fighting.

32. The moon always moons the earth at night so that it won’t get caught.

33. The planetoid Makemake has a satellite called “Dodo.”

Click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts and Sayings.