Thoughts and Sayings (April 2012)

thinker

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in March. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. When you overestimate your abilities, you end up feeling shortchanged.

2. I’m swimming in the sea of life when I’d rather be on the shore sipping on a drink and watching the sunset.

3. I’m writing my pièce de résistance. I’ve struggled with it for so long that it will never stop fighting with me.

4. I’m determined to get something done today. Does drinking coffee count?

5. The tongue is mightier than the pen.

6. Seize the day! If you do, be prepared for a struggle.

7. If your dream has become a nightmare, it’s time for a new one.

8. The best way to attract real friends is to be real.

Twisted Words

9. Why can’t “good afternoon” be “good beforeevening“?

10. Says the cream puff to the chocolate éclair: “Wow, this place is desserted.”

11. Warning: Ultraviolent rays have the ability to kill you.

12. Aerodramatic: The art of crying at the speed of flight.

13. I’m not sure if I’m more sardonic or sarcastic. Perhaps sardoncastic.

14. Don’t take wood for granite.

15. Overheard at a meeting of contortionists: “Be flexible!”

16. Never suggest a health condition is grave to someone who is terminally ill.

Holidays & Events

17. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Since you’re in the green, I get the gold.

18. Beware the Ides of March,” said the soothsayer to Julius Caesar. His English was impeccable.

19. Beware, beware the Ides of March! Psst…what’s an ‘Ides’?

20. Heading into Super Tuesday, the polls showed that the new iPad is leading by a wide margin.

21. Happy Cinco de Marzo! Oh, wait, sorry. I’ll be back in a couple of months.

22. I forgot that yesterday was Leap Year and marched right past it.

Random Musings

23. European chocolates are delicious but too delectable to eat like candy.

24. Why aren’t there any books with the opening sentence, “It was a bright and calm morning?”

25. A guy walks into a bar. It was metal. It hurt.

26. My bed is calling. For some reason, it’s saying, “You have reached a non-working number. Please hang up and try again.”

27. Thank you for paying attention to me. However, my medium of exchange is cash.

28. You have reached a real person. If you feel you’ve reached me in error and prefer an automated system, contact 800-SPAM-BOT.

29. When food is revolting, does it rebel against you?

Intra-galactic Sophomoric Humor

30.  Uranus is the most joked about planet in the solar system.

31.  Earth stands between Mars and Venus to keep them from fighting.

32.  The moon always moons the earth at night so that it won’t get caught.

33.  The planetoid Makemake has a satellite called “Dodo.”

 

Click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts and Sayings.

A Long Break

I spent the time during the holiday break studying Korean.  The department was kind enough to let me work one-on-one with two instructors who came into work during the break.  It helped me substantially improve my Korean conversation.  I wasn’t able study outside of class as much as I would have liked, but at least on Monday when classes start again I’ll be better prepared.  I have one month to polish up this infernal language, and after four days of tutoring I feel much better about my ability to meet the language requirement.  I’ll never complain about learning German, Spanish, or Chinese again (until I start learning Chinese characters again).

The death toll from the tsunamis rose to 116,000 after Indonesia reported that over 80,000 people had perished.  What a tragedy!  This is the single worst event in world history since the 1976 earthquake in southern China that killed more than 500,000 people.  I’m my American mind these events are unfortunately measured by numbers of casualties; in reality the situation is much, much worse than merely the death toll.  This will have substantial repercussions for years to come throughout the Indian Ocean Rim–devastated families, lost livelihoods, destroyed villages and towns, ruined local economies, international economic recession, a huge debt burden for donor and recipient nations.  The prospects just don’t look good.  This event does not impact the average American like 9/11 did because it didn’t hit so close to home, but in the coming years it will have just as much impact on the world as 9/11 did.  What a tragedy.

I’ve been following the Washington State Gubernatorial race very closely.  The Secretary of State Sam Reed (R) just certified Christine Gregoire (D) as governor over Dino Rossi (R).  Gregoire won the second recount, a hand recount, by just 130 votes out of 2.8 million cast.  Rossi won the initial machine count and machine recount by 261 and 42 votes respectively.  It’s been 8 weeks since the election, and this may continue to drag out in the courts for weeks or months.  The GOP is now calling for a revote.  Based on all the potential irregularities, a run-off may be the best option.  Most countries mandate run-off elections when a candidate garners less than a majority vote.  Most Washington voters agree that a revote is the best option based on a recent Elway poll.  It’s a tainted race, and no one can know for certain who won regardless of who becomes governor.  I suspect Gregoire will be governor because Washington State is heavily Democratic, but she will carry a burden that President Bush carried for four years after the 2000 Presidential Election–she will have won the governorship based on state supreme court rulings.  It will be interesting to see what the Republicans do in the coming weeks.  This was the GOP’s best chance in decades to win the governorship, but if they aren’t careful they will come off as spoilers.  The Dems were spoilers when they insisted on a second hand recount, a method that is inherently less accurate than a machine recount and prone to divination to determine voter intent.  The Dems took a risk and won–so far.  It’s politics at its worst, unfortunately.  A run-off is definitely the better course of action than conceding in a tainted race or dragging the fight out in court.  The best results are that it will shine a spotlight on the Washington State electoral process and hopefully improve it before the 2006 election.