Cattle

Thoughts & Sayings (October 2013)

Here are some thoughts and sayings I posted on Twitter and/or Facebook in July, August, and September. To my knowledge, I made these up (for better or for worse). Sit back, relax, and enjoy the write!

Encouraging Words

1. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Fermented, and they’ll drink with you all day.

2. I have some words of wisdom to share with you. Excuse me while I take them out of Pandora’s box.

Twisted Words

3. It’s harder to herd kids than goats.

4. A sacred cow cows a scared cow.

In Its Own Write

5. Fiction writing is the novelist concept.

6. Poetry may set you free but to make it rhyme takes time.

Holidays & Events

7. Today is Outdependence Day for those who don’t celebrate the 4^th of July.

Random Musings

8. We interrupt this report about yelling fire in a crowded theater for breaking news about a fire in a crowded theater.

9. “Because I can,” said the man when asked why he works at a packaging plant.

10. “What’s so great about sliced bread?” asked the baker.

11. Out of the mouths of babes comes drool.

Click here to visit the Thoughts & Sayings page, or click here to read the previous batch of Thoughts & Sayings.

Images courtesy of Microsoft.

Ten Reasons to Visit Paraguay (A Satire)

Dear Reader,

Here is a list of reasons why you should come to visit Paraguay.

10. Pretend you’re a gaucho at a cattle ranch in the Chaco.

9. Learn some Guaraní phrases and have no idea what you’re saying.

8. Share some tereré with your ten newest Paraguayan friends.

7. Search for old Alfredo Stroessner memorabilia.

6. Speak Plattdeutsch and eat schnitzel in a Mennonite Colony.

5. Look for “Tigres” that look like jaguars.

4. Play “spot the knock-off” in Ciudad del Este.

3. Fish for piranhas in the Rio Paraguay.

2. Find the Taiwanese Embassy in Asunción.

1. Hunt for Nazi fugitives who assumed new identities.

You will only understand the profundity of this list by visiting the unique country that is Paraguay.

More About Paraguay

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